Today was the day the baby came! Actually... it all happened so fast! Andrea and I arrived about three minutes after the baby had been born... but that's jumping the gun... I'll tell the story from the start.
I felt jumpy the whole of last week every time my phone went thinking it was Andrea calling to tell me it was really happening. Finally I let it go, the baby would come in the right time. Last night after feeling peaceful about the whole thing I was pretty sure that it wouldn't be too much longer and kept my phone close by me. Andrea (Sarah's* midwife and my mentor) messaged me at 8:00am to let me know Sarah had started labouring but that it was still early days and she'd call me when things got going and she was on her way.
Knowing how fast Sarah's last baby had been I ate breakfast, had a shower and put my keys in my shoes and made sure that my car wasn't blocked in by any other vehicles in the drive way.
With study beckoning I sat down to use up the time... but gave up realizing I needed to clear my head and pray. Small group at church last night was pretty intense, watching a very disturbing movie set in Iraq that was quite emotionally upheaving. I didn't want to bring that into the birthing space, so sat quietly with God and prayed and let it go.
The phone rang at 0915, Andrea was driving and said, "I'm on my way, Andrew* rang and said I'd better get over there...things are happening quickly!" Knowing Sarah's history we didn't even discuss if she was transitional or pushing, I just said I was on my way and jumped in the car.
I kept the radio off. News is a distraction and is usually bad, there was no peaceful music so I drove in silence recalling Sarah's previous births that she'd retold to me. Her last little boy was so fast the midwives didn't make it in time. By the time I got to her suburb I knew I wouldn't be there for the birth, and was pretty sure Andrea wouldn't make it either. It was a peaceful feeling though, Sarah knows her body supremely well and I was confident things would pan out perfectly weather a midwife was there or not.... we were both on the way and there was nothing more we could do.
Pulling into the drive way I saw Andrea's gear by the door, a pretty good indicator things had already happened and she'd simply walked in to see what was going on and would come out to get her gear if need be. The front door was open, it was quiet and I walked in softly, no need to rush and found them all gathered around the birth pool (which didn't have time to fill properly!).
Sarah was flushed and awefilled, holding her new baby against her breasts, body submerged in the rosey water. Andrew was in next to her and their two sons (Noah and Liam) were excitely hanging over the sides of the pool to see their new sibling. Andrea was cross-legged on the floor close by, simply watching and keeping an eye on things. Sarah's friend Marie, who looked after the boys, took photos. There were no intrusions just a gentle quiet, respecting that first mother baby contact.
Andrea laughed and told me she'd stepped inside a minute after the baby was born. All was well, the baby was pink and content being supported in the water, making gentle arm movements, fingers and toes fanning out in the water, large eyes fixing on her mother face. I sat down near the birth pool and just watched the quiet moment.
Marie and I went about keeping the bath water a good tempurature, carting warm water from the laundry, and put some towels and wraps in the oven to warm up while Sarah remained in the pool for the placenta to be born. It took a while. The boys wandered in and out, nibbling on snacks, and coming to admire the baby. The littlest one Noah munched away on chocolate balancing his four year old self on the side of the pool asking, "Mum, do you think the baby want's some of my chocolate?" The boys were so comfortable it was if Sarah had a baby in their dining room every day! While Sarah explained the baby only ate breastmilk, Noah ducked off to find his swiming goggles and brought them over to the pool as and offering to his new water-baby sister.
To add even more to the atmosphere Marie accidently set alight one of the towels on Sarah's birthing alter with candles. She clutched it up trying to smother it with the rest of the fabric without sucsess and we ended up dousing it in the sink. Lots of laughter over that!
The placenta came and Sarah did it all, asking Andrea only for a few directions. On inspection of the "sack the baby had been in" as we held up the placenta and membranes, Noah informed us that he thought the baby might like to be back in there :)
With blankets warmed and the pool cooling, Sarah got out, passing the baby to Andrew along with the icecream container holding the placenta as it was still attached. The whole family cuddled up on the couch and Sarah went through her thread box to find something appropriate to tie the cord with. I thought it was beautiful the way she carefully tied it, watching her baby closely ensuring that baby was ready to be separated.
Leaving them space Andrea and I cleaned the dining room as much as possible beside draining the pool. The placenta was checked and we went over to the pool to estimate blood loss. As the pool was only half full, the blood in the water was more concentrated than normal. It was dark red, still translucent, but darker than other water births I'd attended. Andrea reminded me that if the bath had been full the water would have been more of a rosey colour which is quite okay. It was good to talk that stuff through and reflect on it.
We stayed present in the background, Andrea doing paper work and I collected and washed up the dishes everyone had made from eating celebratory banana cake (which Sarah had whipped up before things got too intense... it was cooked, warm and ready by the time there was a birthday to celebrate!)
After fourish hours observing we left. It was such a lovely space to leave, knowing you could bring the memory of it with you. We lugged Andrea's unused gear back to the car... I think all that was used in the end was a pair of sterile scissors to cut the cord, and one cord clamp was left incase they thought the thread wasn't tight enough. It's so good to know that hardly anything was needed....
I think something I'm learning more and more about about midwifery is that is revolves around the need to be skillful in learning how to do nothing well! Discerning when to leave well enough alone and when to step in when extra care is required. It takes a mighly lot of competence to be comfortable doing nothing.... and Andrea simply guarded the space by being attentive, taking in the whole picture and sitting back letting what was happening happen.
It was a beautiful day and the fact my car over heated on the way home and took three hours to fix, didn't make it any less enjoyable! I think I'm high!
Pandora by J.W. Waterhouse
